A Day In The Life Of A Single Mama.

Or at least this mama. Today we woke up around 0600. Or at least I did. I think I got them up around 0615. We had one disagreement over clothes (since we got home late last night and didn't lay them out-which doesn't always help since usually SOMEONE (about 3 1/2 feet tall, blonde hair and blue eyes) who shall remain unnamed usually changes their mind. We ate breakfast and then left for school and work. We were late (which really means we were on time)but that doesn't usually happen. Tuesdays and Thursdays the wonderful people at preschool take ClaireBeth to school since I have to be at work by 0745. So I get to work where I have a very irritated, grumpy day. Because we left late last night the office was a mess this morning and none of my paperwork was done, which always makes things worse. Dr cleaned two of the rooms, but she never does it the way I do. Around 1000 VeeZee's teacher calls me to tell me that VeeZee was hit in the face with a hula hoop (we're guessing she walked into it). So now she looks like Rocky after a fight. Lovely. I make it through most of my day without getting fired-though I did have to leave the room a few times to accomplish it-and leave to get the girls. Their teacher at preschool has a final tonight and I try to get there so she's not late to class, which doesn't always happen. Poor Meemaw! When I get there they tell me that ZoeBel threw up. Not the end of the world. Until VeeZee throws up, too! Usually I take the girls back to work with me while I finish up with the last patient and do all my paperwork and clean everything up. Since VeeZee and I are covered in throw up I have to call and have one of the helpers tell her that I'm not coming back. Fun. So we came home, bugged Mr. Philip and took a bath. ClaireBeth and I snuck some food while the little girls were busy, since they're STILL throwing up. At least they're both old enough to get to the toilet (or at least the bathroom) to throw up. They're currently watching Dora and I'm wondering if I'm going to go to work all day tomorrow. Not that I have much of a choice. *sigh* Dora's over, so time to cuddle. Definitely one of the best perks of having three little princesses!

What a great weekend!

I haven't had such a great weekend in a while, though I have definitely had some good ones. It started with getting out of work on time Thursday. That very rarely happens, especially on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I have to go pick the girls up at 1730 every day. Tuesdays and Thursdays office hours end at 1700 but we still usually have patients when I leave to get the girls and so have to come back. Mondays and Wednesdays we're open until 1800. I come back on Mondays and work usually until almost 1900 (and sometimes later), though Wednesdays the girls and I have class or choir so we go straight to church from preschool. Anyway, back to this weekend!

We got out on time Thursday and went to Sam's club for pizza. One of our favorite stores combined with one of our favorite foods. How can you go wrong? Friday I took ClaireBeth to class and then went and did some paperwork that I still needed to do for her school. The little girls and I came home and cleaned up and then we took ClaireBeth to the doctor in San Diego for a rash (fun-don't worry, she's not contagious). After that we went to my parents' and spent the night. We made cookies and had a lot of fun! I even got to talk to my sister! (Roger's daughter who's about my age.)

Saturday I left the girls with my parents because they've missed the girls so much. I went to a much needed hair appointment with the awesome, fantastic, wonderful Marcella. It had been three months and you could definitely tell. Ugh. I still can't do it like she does, but I'm trying. Kind of. The I went to a cookie exchange and saw quite a few friends from The Fellowship. Ladies, I miss you! Then I came home and waited for Philip to come down. Even though I woke him up at 0630 and he left around 0700 he didn't get here until after 1400! Stupid LA traffic. When he got here we went looking for car parts (it seems to be a favorite past time of his), out to dinner at a nice Chinese place, shopping were we got a Christmas tree and then to church for the Christmas musical. It was a very fun, very busy day! Though I guess I should confess that I locked us out of the house. Twice! We take his car when he's here, so I didn't really need my keys. Until we got home and he realized that I didn't have them and so we couldn't get in. Thankfully the manager was home. Then we left to go shopping and took the little set with us (with the mail, laundry room and extra apartment (I thought) keys) so we could make an extra one for Philip's key chain. We forgot to make the extra but figured we were fine. Until I tried to unlock the door and realized that it was the key for the storage, not the apartment. And guess what, the manager was gone for the night! At this point I realized that I also forgot to give my parents the girls' car seats. Sometimes I am amazed at how blonde I am! I had called the manager and she called me back, thankfully, saying that someone could get in and give us the keys. Otherwise we were going to have to drive to San Diego to get keys and still drive down to pick the girls up the next day since I couldn't get into the van for the car seats. So, disaster averted. Whew!

Sunday we drove down to pick up the girls and picked out ornaments for the tree. This year its red and silver. I've never had red before because Eric really didn't like it. At home we ate lasagna and watched the Little Einstein's Christmas DVD that Philip bought for the girls. We decorated the tree (during which Philip did like five years' worth of updates on the computer) and hung the lights outside. Then we ate lots of cookies from the cookie swap! And in the process of rescuing the new movie that ZoeBel got stuck in a funny place we found Barbie in The 12 Dancing Princesses that we've been missing for over a year! So Philip has since started the five hour drive home and we are watching Barbie in the glow of our Christmas lights while I blog about a great few days. They weren't without frustration, but we definitely had something to laugh about.

Philip

So, to continue a chapter that has had a few surprise turns. Apparently a girlfriend with three girls can be a bit to take on all at once, even though you've just spent the last nine months talking to her everyday and think that she and the girls are fantastic. So Philip decided that we weren't dating. This was especially hard because he wanted to be a part of the girls' lives that early and that's why I introduced them to him. For someone who's been single for so long like he has I can understand. I let it be for a few days and then curiosity got the best of me and I called him and asked if we could actually talk about it (and to ask him to ship my makeup, favorite razor and tweezers and the load of laundry that were left up there). So we did and we've decided to talk and see each other but to remove the girls from the situation for right now. He loves the girls to death but I chose this to protect them. I wouldn't have brought him in so quickly if he hadn't wanted to be. And to be fair to the girls his problem is just more with the whole picture than with them. But it seems safest for them so they don't get more attached than they already are.

So just an update on that. It seemed quite dire at the beginning of the week but has levelled out some. Thank goodness for maturity and reason! The ability to sit down and talk to someone about the problem is amazing. And definitely not what I'm used to.

So what's going on...

I started this almost two weeks ago and am just going from there, so it might seem messed up, but you'll have to deal :)

Hmm, where to start? Well, it's a quarter till 9 and I hear a two-and-a-half-year-old and a seven-year-old playing tea set. Did I mention it was 9 PM? I think back about my day and marvel at the good and the not so good. I went to ClaireBeth's parent/teacher conference. She's doing very well. Great grades, great conduct. The usual. But I wonder how she's really doing. I hear a lot that she's well adjusted. Sometimes I wonder if she's already learning to fake it like I do all the time. Like many of us do.


Thinking about how well ClaireBeth is doing makes me think about ZoeBel. Already I can see that this blog is going to seem random and ill-organized. I think I'm okay with that today. ZoeBel is sick. A fever and a cough, mostly. Though she did throw up tonight, but I think that was my fault. I was brushing her teeth and might have gagged her. But ZoeBel's different. She is so sweet and open and begging to be loved. It's hard to fill her up constantly. Especially with working all the time. I have a hard enough time going to GOD for love and contentment, which just makes telling the girls to go to HIM even harder. ZoeBel is smart, but she has this streak that can turn mean and hard and bitter if not tempered. I just have no clue how to help her at this point. It makes me very scared for her future.


VeeZee is just VeeZee. Sometimes I think there's a stranger in the house. I've lived with her for three years and I feel like I barely even know her. Part of it is how much she's growing and changing at this stage. She does something new and unexpected at least a couple of times a week. And unfortunately I usually miss it.I don't see how people can stand choosing to have children and then putting them into daycare. Don't get me wrong and please don't take it personally. I know that sometimes circumstances change and you might have to work or sometimes a child is a surprise (been there and done that with both situations!). But I'm missing my children grow up and it makes me so sad. I feel like I'm cheating VeeZee out of her toddlerhood and me out of mamahood.


Umm, on to me, I guess. Well, I've been divorced for two weeks come tomorrow (yea me?). That first day I felt sick and disgusted like I'd physically been torn in two. I guess hence the verses about us becoming as one flesh. The next day I kind of went back to normal. It helps, I guess, that we were divorced on the 27th, which was four days short of a year since he left. Also, my friend Philip came down. But more about him later. That day, though, I picked the girls up from school early and went home and slept. Philip and the girls and I went out to dinner that night and I went back to work the next day and the world went on. It's actually pretty sad. Who's Philip? Philip is a great guy that I became friends with in February. We went to the same church for a year or so but never actually met. Gotta love facebook! So we started talking and became friends. Then we started talking about dating if/when the divorce finalized. Which it did. I'm still not sure if we're dating or not but we're having fun, considering we live 5 hours apart.

Work is still work. I'm up in front a lot more, where I feel completely inadequate to be. Not that there's too much choice. We had an intern for a while but she didn't work out and so now I'm doing front and back again. I like the office and I like the work I just hate being away from the girls.

I found a great church home for us. Or rather, GOD brought us to a great church home. I'm taking a bible class and the big girls are doing choir. ClaireBeth has a solo, which I think is hilarious since she sings about as well as I do, which is not that well. But they love it and I love that they love worship and praise music. I just wish they made music that I liked a little more. Dang Christians, being so moderate!

So I'm done avoiding cleaning for right now. Have a great day!

Hmm...

So I want to blog. I miss blogging. I keep thinking of things to blog about, or at least trying to. I've lost that up-beat, slightly sarcastic, poking-fun at myself but still entertaining tone that I used to have. It's been gone for about 11 months. Wow, it's actually gone by fast.

There's not a whole lot going on. Eric is still insistent on the divorce. It should be finalized in the next month or so. I kept hoping he'd change his mind but I really doubt that's going to happen. I quit praying for it just because I doubted it so much. Oh me of little faith. I know GOD has the ability to do anything and can soften the hardest heart. And HE still can. So I'll start praying. That our marriage is restored? I don't know. After it's final I won't remarry Eric unless he were to make GOD the center of his life (if the subject ever came up which I doubt it will :P). But that at least Eric realize there is someone who loves him way more than anyone on this earth can.

Work is there. I went to San Francisco with Dr. for the California Dental Association. We had a lot of fun, I learned a good bit and we went to see King Tut! Very cool! We're trying to get some people to help me, but now we have so many people that it's an even bigger mess. We have two high school volunteers who are just trying to pad their resume. They're seniors, though, so I'm not sure how much good it will do them. One is doing special stuff in the front. Another is an intern from a dental assistant who wants back. So I'm switching somewhat to front when she's there. If she stays. She's a single mom with two kids.

The girls are doing well, what I see of them. ClaireBeth is really enjoying school and going to a birthday party on Tuesday for one of her really good friends. ZoeBel and VeeZee are doing really well in preschool. They're both doing very well with the stuff they should be learning. ZoeBel is doing basic addition. VeeZee is counting and as long as she's counting something she does okay. Mainly I love that Meemaw and Papi love all three girls.

So that's about it. We've had a lot of friends move recently, but we've been spending more time with family. One of my best friends comes back from deployment next month. I have a cat who loves me, even if she's not that into the girls (can you blame her-just kidding!). But yup. That's about it. I've missed you guys and hope everyone's well!

Most Difficult People To Deal With

This was sent by one of my favorite people in the world. She has been a great mentor and source of love for years.

SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT!

I am sure that you had encountered some people whom you find most difficult to deal with. Perhaps this reminds you of someone as you read this. Your problems with them are not really due to how they are, but rather due to how you respond to how they are. People are different. Therefore, it is highly recommended that you learn their "language" to communicate. Learn to deal successfully with difficult people, and you learn valuable lessons about yourself. People are the way they are. Get past the need to try to change them, past the need to judge or condemn, and look for the value they offer. If you happen to pray for them, do not pray that they would be changed. Rather, pray that you would be transformed so that you will discover hidden value in them, and that you learn how to deal with them. In every difficult person you encounter, make a point to look past the difficult part and focus your attention on the person part. So, we can conclude they are your teachers! Through their difficulties you see things within yourself. And it takes courage to view yourself through them. But the rewards exceed the overcoming the fear.

"The crucible for silver and the furnace for gold, but the Lord test the heart." (Pv 17:3)

Walk with the King and be a blessing!

Sometimes It's Not Fun Being A Big Person

This was just an irritating week at work. That's a lot of it. The repetitiveness of work completely makes me ignore the repetitiveness of the up-keep of the house. Monday I was there until after 2000. ClaireBeth was supposed to get some sealants done and instead ended up having a tooth that needed three fillings! Tuesday, Wednesday and today were long, too. I was almost able to go home after picking up the girls but I couldn't find something expensive. I finally found it, and still somehow ended up working until 1930.

On an up note, VeeZee is progressing quite well at potty training. I put her in panties and plastic pants on Friday and she's been in them since. After getting the hang of it, which took a few days, she's had one accident a day. At least with pee (I'm not sure how to put that delicately). We're not really getting anywhere with the other. She doesn't quite realize what her body's telling her. But it's been less than a week.

I'm also looking at trying some new recipes tomorrow. Snickerdoodles and cream puff cake. I'll let you know how they go.

A Sweet Saturday

So today was nice. I got up very early and got to email with one of my best friends. The living portion of the living room (it's split into living/office by the couch/chair) is clean, even if there are still boxes to unpack. It's mostly the girls' stuff or random junk that I'm not really sure why we have or where it should go. But I'd rather it sit in the living room and me hopefully get rid of it as opposed to stuffing it in the storage closet and moving it to the next place we move, whether it be a month, a year or a decade from now. And the exercise bike that I had to have and Eric was sweet enough to get me even though he knew I'd never use it-it sat in his closet for a year-and-a-half to two years. The office portion if the living room is still a mess, but I'll do that tonight, after I do some dishes, since we have no clean ones left. I'm amazed at how little enthusiasm I have for cleaning the house now that I spend 10 hours a day cleaning at work. It's even worse than it was before! But then I could get up at 0500 and clean before the girls got up because I knew I could take a nap. There amazingly aren't naps when you work. Some days there aren't even lunches! But the girls played today. I added some photos to facebook if you'd like to see. They watched a movie while I took a nap with Patches. We tried out the park, which is a decent walk from here. We didn't stay long because I'm such a white girl and even in the shade I felt my shoulders getting hot. And unfortunately ZoeBel is like me. ClaireBeth was blessed with Eric's skin tone. Let's just hope she doesn't have his skin problems when she's a teenager. VeeZee is a throw back to my dad. I can safely say that only because I'm sure Eric's her dada, otherwise I'd be wondering myself. She has the same hair and eyes I had when I was little, but she's blessed with a beautiful tan all year round. And some say "Well, you live in sunny SoCal." It'd be the same if we lived in Michigan. Not that I would like to test that theory. So we're home from the park and it's now time to figure out dinner, since I didn't look at the menu and take any meat out. Wish me luck, and let's hope I can come up with something more interesting than spaghettios!

Adventures In Dentistry: Trying To Do Your Own Kids' Cleanings.

So the girls were a month or so overdue for their cleanings and exams. Dr and I finally found a spot for them.

We try to get ZoeBel to go, partly because we have to do impressions for an appliance to help her stop sucking her thumb. She refuses so ClaireBeth goes. ClaireBeth who's been doing this for five years and is a pro. ZoeBel's been doing it for three. but acts like she's never seen the inside of a dentist's office in her life (which is hilarious since she goes to work with me all the time). I finally convince her to let me clean her teeth. She ends up standing up, leaning over my leg. Then when Dr. comes in from finishing ClaireBeth, who was a perfect angel-which is why Dr. got her and I got ZoeBel, I end up having to hold ZoeBel in my lap. And she still balked! But we got her done. Now we just have to take impressions tomorrow!

Vee I actually ended up chasing through the office. It was after hours, I promise! I would have just let her go, otherwise. I had to strap her down with my arms and legs and pry her mouth open, but we at least got the front clean. You should have seen her when ClaireBeth got three prizes for her cleaning, exam and going first without crying and ZoeBel got two prizes for her cleaning and exam. But she still wouldn't let us clean or look anymore. Stubborn child! And did I mention that I bribed ZoeBel? I did. I told her if she did her impressions without fussing or crying then I'd buy her a new pony or groovy girl. I know, I'm horrible. But I'm hoping $10 now will save $100s or possibly $1000s down the line. Not likely, but we shall see. Another reason I became a dental assistant-we get good discounts.

What To Blog, What To Blog...

I'm sure no one even reads this anymore since postings are so sporadic and they've all kind of sounded the same. I've started a few posts, but half-way through I'll decide that I shouldn't or don't want to post them. While a blog is fun, you have to be careful what you put in it. Sometimes things can come back and bite you in the rear. Same with facebook. So I don't complain about work. I don't share my frustration about Eric. I don't tell y'all that if I hear "Mama" one more time I'm going to take all of their plastic toys and melt them in the chemiclave at work. Oops, shouldn't have let that one slip out...oh well.

So Life. Well, it's going. And at this point it's a little bit lonely. Randi has moved the Maryland, she's actually been there since May. She's about 4 months along with their fourth baby. Her husband is doing recruiting duty. Charlie and Mia, my best friends from high school, moved to Maryland in June. She was going to graduate school in LA. She was there for a good two or three years. I finally went and visited in May. Isn't that sad?! I was very glad when they moved from LA, just sad that they moved so far away. They're trying to get me to move out there with them. Bill and Sarah moved to Virginia. Bill got transferred to Washington, D.C.The person I talk to the most is on a boat somewhere in the middle of the ocean. It's through email. Thank goodness for email. And facebook. blogging is nice, too, but that requires that you actually do it. ;)

Since some of you don't know, Eric and I went back to mediation, where a counselor helps us figure out a parenting schedule. The girls are still living with me, we just had to work out what to do when Eric's schedule changes in October. We did find out that the divorce could be final as early as late-October/early-November. My lovely husband asked if we could move that particular court date sooner. Lovely.

Work is work. Doctor and I are going to San Francisco in September for a dental convention. I get to go to seminars/take classes, so it should be fun. It's still just her and I. And I'm horrible at insurance so unfortunately it falls to her to do. Mainly we just haven't had time to teach me and let me do it with her to make sure I know what I'm doing. She only wants me to work 40 hours a week, and you run out of hours when you work 10 hour days. This week is light. Maybe I can go in on Friday so we can work on that. That plus it's good to know as much front office as possible, even if you work back.

Umm, what else. I was sick for two days last week and got to take time off work. Yea! Everyone loves that! ClaireBeth starts school in less than three weeks. 2nd grade-very scary! I can't believe she just turned 7. ZoeBel and VeeZee are doing well, as is ClaireBeth. We're getting into somewhat of a normal routine. I know, about time. I guess I haven't been too diligent because I know it's going to change when ClaireBeth goes to school, and now in October when Eric has more time it will really change, but only for 6 weeks, then it changes again. Like VeeZee isn't potty trained yet just because I know I don't have enough time together to do it. Which is sad, she could have been potty trained months ago. ZoeBel no longer needs training pants at night though. Yea, ZoeBel!

Well, I'm off to eat my chicken nuggets and go back to bed. If you bother to read this anymore, leave me a comment so I know you're out there.

ClaireBeth Turns Seven!

Happy Birthday to Me! Happy Birthday to Me!


Birthday cinnamon toast. And a wish.

Yea, I'm seven!

Hey!!!

So we're still kicking. I've started writing a couple of posts, but often once I start writing I feel better about whatever I was writing about and am able to look at it and know that I shouldn't post it. But we are here.

ClaireBeth came home. YEA!!! She come up to my underarm and has humongous feet, but still. She finished 1st grade and I have her registered at school here already. ZoeBel and Vee are going to a great preschool and ClaireBeth is joining them for the summer.

We tried a new church today. I loved the sermon and music but we'll have to see about the kids' stuff. I think ZoeBel's was the one I was least happy about. The teacher was there even after she'd traded for the week off and was kind of complaining to the lady that was taking us around right in front of us. And she was older. After having an awesome kids' ministry with a lot of younger, energetic women I'm not used to the more straight-laced, by the book classes. Maybe Rana (Pastor's wife and head of the elementary age group at FSD) should come do some consulting!

I'm still at the same office. It's still Doctor and myself, though she's having someone come in Wednesday to try out. We just get swamped on days when we do all fillings and crowns and the like, as opposed to cleanings and stuff. I've been there for four months and officially hired for about three.

Eric and I went to mediation to figure out a visitation schedule and came away with pretty much exactly what we were already doing. It's really just his work schedule that's the problem. But we're trying to work it out. We go to court tomorrow to get guidelines pretty much for all the other junk. We'll see how it goes. I had to take the day off, but at least I might get to sleep in or get some stuff done tomorrow before I head down. I have a few errands to run and am having lunch with one of the best women I know, who's also leaving in July for Virginia/DC. I love how God provides strength and love in the form of people during the storms, I just hate when they're called somewhere else. Thank goodness we live in a time of facebook, email and skype, though.

As to the apartment, I'm finally feeling like I'm getting somewhere with unpacking. I had to take all of the girls' books away, though. The living room's not done, but it's getting there. I still have some boxes of random junk, though. But I'm getting to the point where I want to rearrange everything. I'm nuts, I know.

So I'm off to fold/hang some of the six loads of clean laundry I have yet to do. I really do miss blogging and checking in on all of my friends that blog as well. Facebook is a demanding mistress. But...So long, farewell, auf Wiedersehen, good-bye; Adieu, adieu, to yieu and yieu and yieu...

Hello from Vista!

Just checking in. Well, the little girls and I are in our new apartment. I won't say we're actually moved in since there are more boxes than I remember packing sitting in our living room, but we're surviving. The girls started a new school this week, after two days at a day care, one day at work with me, a week with my mom, a new neighbour I'd met once the day before and a friend. Work's going well.

Eric filed finally. It only took five months for him to get around to it. I got them on Easter even! He left them at his dad's house the day before. His sister had to give them to me because his dad and his dad's girlfriend couldn't bear to do it. Lovely. I went ahead and filed a response. I didn't want to, but the state of Claifornia doesn't really care about whether both parties want the divorce or not. Oh well.

Okay, better go. Dinner's ready. I'll write something more detailed soon!

Hiya!

So we got approved for the apartment. I move on Saturday. Except my family doesn't seem to realize it and still expects us on Sunday. I guess we'll live. We even got a kitty to go with it. Patches (still debating changing it) fits in great with us girls, which isn't necessarily a good thing. She's independent, opinionated and fierce. She's also quite good at letting you know that she doesn't like something. 

ClaireBeth is having a great time in Ohio. I still talk to her everyday. I found daycare for ZoeBel and Vee, which is very exciting. And the woman is an answer to prayer. She is willing to work with me concerning fees and times.

Work is going fairly well. I'm not sure what I'm going to do about church. I'd planned on leaving, but things happened faster than I expected after nothing happening for a while and so I don't know if I'm ready or not yet.

No real news on any other front. I'll post photos soon. I also have them up on facebook.

Hello Again

Well, my mother-in-law has come and gone, taking ClaireBeth back to Ohio with her. ClaireBeth loves her new school, has a new bike and is having a great time. I call her every morning and we talk and pray before she goes to school. 

ZoeBel and Vee are doing okay. They don't really talk about ClaireBeth, and I'm worried that they think she's one more person who has disappeared from their life. They haven't talked to her yet, but they will today. 

I've found a cute place to live, I just need to apply and get approved. I'll do that Monday (I had hoped to do it today, but oh well). They allow cats (I don't know how many), so I'm thinking about getting one (maybe two!) for the girls. I just don't want to wait until ClaireBeth gets home. I found a great blog to adopt kitties in the area, fabulousfelines.blogspot.com. It's a little expensive, but the cats are young, fixed, dewormed and vaccinated. You also get a free vet visit. So maybe for the girls' birthday (early:D). I still don't know what I'm going to do about childcare. Scary.

Work is going okay. I'm getting better and feeling a little more confident. Except when it comes to ordering. I was supposed to do that today and just could not focus, so I didn't get it done.  I kind of just left. 

Eric. Well, Eric is grumpy. Eric is making poor choices. Eric got the position he wanted at work, but I don't see the point. What is a position at work going to get you?

So I'm off. My plans for today were messed up, but I'm sure I can find something to do.

Where has the time gone?

Good grief. It's only been like two months. I guess I'll go by topic as opposed to person.

So school. I have one week left. I'm at a 98% on my tests. I'll definitely miss the office when I'm done. It's nice to be in a place that is well organized and full of fun people.

On to work. I'm currently doing a "paid internship". Which means that someone that interviewed me and had me come in for free for two half days (where I worked 22 hours over those two days) still hasn't decided if they want to hire me full time. I'm also the only assistant in the office. I finally told the doctor that I needed to be paid since I have three little girls. Dr was supposed to decide after this last week if they wanted to hire me. Of course no decision. But I am getting paid (though not what I should be) and I'm learning a ton. So what if I don't see the girls or eat all day. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger, right? I sent out more resumes and someone else contacted me, I just hope they don't let the distance deter them. It's up in Oceanside and I told them that I was willing to move up there so hopefully it won't. Once I get a job I'll start really looking for a place to stay. No point moving to El Cajon because it's cheap if I work in Fallbrook.

ClaireBeth is going to Ohio to finish first grade. She leaves with my mother-in-law on Thursday It seems the easiest option. There will be no issue with days missed and there will be a reason as to why she doesn't get to see Eric.

So on to Eric. He's still being completely grumpy and non-reconciliatory. He still hasn't filed for divorce but says that he plans to some time this week. He refuses to go to counseling. He keeps saying work has been so busy. I think he forgets that I've been through all but two of the cycles he has. 

ZoeBel is, well, ZoeBel. Nothing much has changed, except she may be more devious than ever.

Vee turned two about a month ago. She's talking in huge sentences and has a strong personality, to use a polite word for it. 

Umm, not a whole lot else. I'm exhausted and kind of grumpy. If I have any spare time on the computer I spend it on Facebook. Not as much writing so I feel less depressed there. Here I just write and it gets kind of pathetic. But yep, that's about it. I'll check in soon, hopefully less than 2 months from now!

Just Checking In

Today was ClaireBeth's first day of school. I went and registered her, which took forever and was rather a pain since I was transferring within the same district. There were a few things that kind of concerned me, but I can't really be too picky right now. She was put into a 1st/2nd combo with Mrs. Johnson. She came home with homework but nothing else. NOTHING else. I'm guessing we should have class stuff by the end of the week, but the teacher wasn't too prepared. Neither was the front office. It was very disorganized. There were quite a few other kids enrolling today and another new girl in ClaireBeth's class. So you would think that it's something the school would be used to. Unfortunately I had to go to work right after I picked ClaireBeth up and then the kids went to bed early today. I'll have to talk to her tomorrow. I haven't really spent a lot of time with the girls since we moved in. Randi does things differently than I do and we're trying to find a balance. 

School and work are great. I'm learning tons and doing tons and am really liking it. But I also haven't seen anything gross yet. I probably don't want to move to hill-billy country to be a dental assistant. Bubba teeth are fun at Halloween and that's about the only time. Laelia is great. She's been rolling all over the place for a while now but her independent streak is coming out and apparently she's not big on stretches or being moved about like a baby doll. Unfortunately it won't get any better from here. But for the most part she's a joy to have, spitting out her food aside. I will definitely miss her when I have to quit.

No news concerning Eric, though he did say he'd some to Vee's party. He tried to say he wouldn't but I convinced him to. It's not her fault and she shouldn't have to suffer because of it. Instead the rest of us will so she can have a few pictures of her birthday party when she's older. Oh well, it's the long run that counts.

Other than that we're good. Randi and I are getting along pretty well, especially considering the fact that it's her house and we're both strong willed. She's much more laid back about stuff though. So I'm living with someone who's aggressively laid back. Go figure. So my routines and methods are having a hard time fitting in, even though it is admitted that they work better. Hmm, maybe we should try couples counseling. And it's a lot harder being a stay at home mom than going out and working. Especially if you actually spend time with your kids. I miss it but like having a few hours away. However I'm not really looking forward to having to work full time. I might actually miss the girls! But I'm off to bed. And wondering what I can reschedule to make everything fit into the week. Wish me luck!

Stupid Widgets

Well, I don't know if that's what happened, but it's a fun word. I tried using a different template site since the one I usually use crashed a few weeks ago. It totally messed up my blog. So I'm not sure how to fix it since I mainly shop and email on the computer. Plus everything is Valentine's right now anyway. Haven't decided what to do with that; or my birthday two weeks after. Hmm, hadn't really thought about this. Sucky.

So A Quick Recap

Went to school Saturday. It was a short day and I wish they had shoved more in. But I have a test next week. We did make impressions (the goopy stuff in the tray),  models (replicas of the teeth from the impressions) and whitening trays. We also watched two videos and saw truly disgusting nasty teeth. Ooh, ooh, I also almost made my partner gag with the tray but got a great impression!

I went in to the office Monday and Tuesday afternoons. It was fun. I've seen fillings, dealt with my first patient who thought he knew more than the dentist, helped with two kids and torn down a lot of rooms and sterilized a lot of instruments. Fun fun fun.

As to the house I am now completely done. My father-in-law and his girlfriend helped a lot and my small group saved me big-time. Sarah came and helped me clean two days and the group watched kids and actually helped me get the rest of my stuff out of the house. Eric wasn't too happy with how it was left but I did all the cleaning and got all of my stuff out. He gets to finish up the house (vacuum a room or two and I'd scrub down the kitchen sink again but whatever). The back yard and the garage are also his to deal with. Apparently, though, Vee spilled rubbing alcohol in his closet and some of the colors from his clothes bled. He was a little grumpy about that too. But I left my keys and garage door opener and so can't go back in. It's a relief but sad. No matter what we couldn't have pulled our notice and I briefly met the people that will move in, but still. Oh well. It's not up to me.

Some Days

Thursday started out a good day. Randi got us Starbucks and filled my van up for me. That was great. Then it went a little downhill. I had to start my HepB vaccines. Right as he's about to stick me the guy says, "Because of the way the medicine's made and it being a little oily it's going to sting a bit." I just look at him for a second. I asked him why he told me that and didn't just stick me and he said he didn't want me to be surprised. Why would I want to know that right before you're going to stick me? 

When I get to the old house nothing's wrong, I'm just not sure where to start or what to do. Dad and Sam and Brandon meet me at the storage to put my dresser in. When I open the door there are all of my dishes lying in a pile on the floor. A good few of them are broken. I didn't want to get a count. So we go back to the house and get more stuff. I get completely turned around and it takes us an extra ten minutes to get to storage because the Balboa exit doesn't actually put you on Balboa. Nice. It all fit and I think I have enough room for the few things left. So when I go over today I can hopefully get a good bit done. Then we're off to bible study late. Randi is too sweet, though. We left home about 1:30 and at 6:30 she called because she was worried about us. She'd forgotten about bible study.

We got there and I was just about to step in Vee when threw up. She had run around the storage place after eating a Mama Rosa's pizza. Then I ran with my arm on her tummy up the street to the house. So I was hoping that was it. Except she did it again. I was at bible study for an hour and probably was a bigger disruption than anything (big surprise, right?!?! When am I not?). And she got mostly carpet. I'm glad I was wearing two layers yesterday. People don't like it when you drive naked. They're not too understanding about throw up and the like. And I still get Laelia today. Not that I don't want her, but Vee's already clingy and whiny today and I don't want Laelia to get sick. 

So off we go to start the day. Woohoo!

Once Again I Need Help

My small group is going over to the old house on Sunday to help me finish cleaning and packing and moving. I hate needing so much help. I don't understand why I can't just do it on my own. Ugh. But at least there are people who will help. I can't imagine having no one to help when I really needed it. My friends and family in Christ are one of my biggest praises. My real family is fantastic, too. But the others do it just out of the love God is pouring through them. But the house should be done at least. I'm worried about going today to get the dresser out of Eric's dad's truck since it is super heavy and there will only be a few of us. AAHHHH!!!!!!

So I'm Late-Big Surprise

Yes, New Year's was a few days ago (five, but who's counting). And so far, it's just another day with a different number at the end. I didn't wake up to find myself in our old room; I didn't instantaneously look like. . .well, there are quite a few attractive actresses, but none that I'd like to look like since everyone's seen pretty much everything there is to see of them. While I was hoping to be out of the house by then (or at least wanting to get it over by then), that didn't happen. So I'm slowly doing the cleaning and the last sorting/packing, knowing I'm not going to get it done by Saturday when I start school and realizing I have only 11 more days to get it done and I don't know how I'm going to get the last few big things out of there. Not too scary until I realize Eric's stuff is still all there and he probably won't help me with any of the cleaning. "Babe, I'm working. I can't get time off. You know how this job is." Said of course in a deep boy voice with just a hint of hurt because you apparently don't care and exasperation that it has to be explained to you. Ugh.

So this year I will have to fully step out and trust God. That's my resolution, as it were, or at least would have been if I had bothered to do one. I start school on Saturday. I'm a little scared that employers will look at it as a short, abbreviated education as opposed to doing one of the 8 to 10 month long schools where you go all day every day. So going is in itself following God. To be given this chance by the owners of the school and a place to live and finding out that the owners are Christians. God didn't even have to hit me over the head with a 2x4 this time, though He did have to pretty much throw me out of the nest so I'd take the chance to fly. But on the upside I got a pretty lavender notebook, colored pens and pretty stickies to go along with my chic scrubs and white shoes with sparklies.  And now of course comes the worries over a job afterwards. And the daycare thing. And where to move to. So off to Matthew we go. Chapter 6 verse 34 is especially appropriate. But alas, same old worries, same old posts, same old blog.

Life right now is very fun. My room is still in boxes. The girls' has been unpacked. Unfortunately it was by them and only one dresser has been brought over so there are clothes everywhere, but hey. Randi and I are getting along pretty well, considering that I've been lazy and apathetic lately. I'm slowly getting better. Very slowly. But at least I'm not getting worse. Laelia's a hoot to work with. Sometimes it can be rather difficult to watch someone else's child, but at least she keeps things interesting. I've watched more anime in the last week than I ever expected to watch in my life. We've been Harry Pottering the last few nights, after a season of His and Her Circumstance and of course before that was Star Trek. We've learned that Randi's dog likes eggnog cookies and both the dog and the cat will eat peas. Of course, why wouldn't they? But it's time to go to bed, to sleep, perchance to dream. Well, okay, I haven't been that melancholy or depressed. Just an overload of Kenneth Branagh. We did learn that watching Harry Potter at 1.5 speed really did speed things up. Randi's dvd player will still play the audio and it didn't take 2.5 hours to get through the movie. Always nice to know. (Kenneth Branagh is in Harry Potter and The Chamber of Secrets, which we watched, if you're wondering where the jump came from. But he's also done several Shakespeares.)