Tenth Day

My Slim and boost didn't come in the mail until the afternoon. Breakfast was cottage cheese and some watermelon and iced coffee with creamer. I ended up splitting a breakfast burrito with someone and it was a good thing, I was having a hard time with patience with some of my students. I forgot lunch. Dinner was spaghetti and kale and potatoes. Later dinner was more spaghetti...and the rest of the breaded fish...and two small rice cakes with hummus and a piece of turkey...

I took my Slim and boost before dinner. I wasn't tired during the day but about an hour after I took the boost I tanked. I don't think the boost was responsible, though, because I sat down and it was after 6:00. Part of why I have to keep going is because generally otherwise I'll crash. I do think the boost has been helping with that but it's hard to tell because I don't usually stop.

Day 9, Doctor's Appointment, Don't Know What To Wear

Today I weighed! But forgot to take pics. So tomorrow it is. Hopefully. Slim and boost in the morning with a thin bagel and 1/2 of cottage cheese. I took some coffee and creamer to work. I tried Pioneer Woman's Iced coffee! I had part of an apple for snack, like just the part around the middle. Lunch was half a quesadilla from Frazier Farms (a local Sprouts-type store) with a LOT of onions and cilantro! Right before a doctor's appointment! Dinner was a quinoa spinach salad with about 2/3 of the dressing pack and a "healthy" frozen dinner. Then after work I got a taco and small fries from Del Taco...

I wasn't too hungry today and my energy was fine. It felt much better than feeling put of control like the last few days. But I have to get over some times were I expect to eat. I feel like Pavlov's dog. As soon as I get in the car to go home from work it's "Ooh, I'm going home from work, I must be hungry!" So last night I had some fruit and veggies. Then I ended up having a piece of bread and two pieces of turkey. I have convinced myself that if I feel hungry I won't go to sleep. And sometimes I say, whatever,  I don't care, so what if it's a bad choice it doesn't matter. And not in a good attitude. Hence the Del Taco.

I went to the doctor today. I had found something to keep an eye on and after over a month decided to go in. I know it's one of two things, both nonserious. So I go and I'm told "You have this." Yeah, duh. That's why I called. So they will call me to set up tests. I know it probably weeds through lots of unnecessary tests and such, but the whole appointment felt like a waste. I know the next steps. I know what that word and procedure are. I can tell you which two things I think it is. Do I really have to come back here? Apparently the answer is yes.

And so...clothes! I have managed to not wear the same shirt for the whole three and a half weeks of summer school. At first it was because I had picked up some cute clothes while shopping with my sister. They have some good thrift stores and consignment shops in Utah! I had also picked up some cute pieces in a thrift store by where I grew up in East County. So it kind of became a game about halfway through the second week. And I have tomorrow figured out. And Friday. But am stuck for Thursday. And I'm choosing to fuss over this than other junk because sometimes you need to focus on something silly.

Day 8

And I need more Slim! And I didn't go running today because I had homework which didn't take as long as I was worried it would but I was already home. And tomorrow I have a doctor's appointment. And Wednesday I have therapy. And Thursday I'm supposed to go out with friends. And Friday I will probably be behind on my homework again! Ugh.

I took my Slim and boost right when I got up and forgot to weigh! So I'll do that tomorrow. Breakfast was peanut butter and pickle on a thin bagel and a trenta sugar free iced coffee. My Starbucks card is empty, so it's no more Starbucks :( Though someone asked if the whole thing had been full of coffee. I told them I just gave up soda, coffee was my next thing! I was hungry when I got home from work, and had a slim-fast and a piece of watermelon around 1:00 or so. Second lunch around 3:00 was a sandwich on 2 pieces of 45 calorie processed bread and two pieces of lunch meat and a handful of sugar snap peas. Dinner around 6:00 was reruns of breaded fish and rice and a sauteed zucchini. The problem was I wasn't quite hungry but kept feeling like I should eat. So it was more of a compulsion than a need. I'm trying to work on that. Throughout the day I threw in some cucumber sticks. When I got home from work I had 3 pieces of watermelon and a handful of snap peas. I tend to treat veggies as a whatever, whenever food but am thinking I need to reclassify them as a gateway food-they do just enough to make you want something more. So I'm drinking more water and telling my taste buds they need to be quiet.

~~~*~~~*~~~Girl Talk Below~~~*~~~*~~~

I didn't feel as tired as I have been lately. But I haven't been feeling as full. Today was the first day or the day before the first day of my cycle and I'm really wondering if that has anything to do with it. I know I've been thinking it would start soon but I was off by a few days. I finally broke down and started using a tracker and realized my cycles are around 34 days long. So I'm not going to complain, but I can't say "Oh, that was around the 12th, that should start again soon."

Day Seven. A Day Late Because I'm Disappointed In Myself.

Yesterday, Sunday, started with my Slim and boost. Breakfast was good. A mini bagel, cream cheese, watermelon, soy yogurt and bacon. It was a large breakfast but not too bad. Trenta sugar free iced coffee during working the nursery. Then lunch. And someone had the dumb idea to get pizza. I initially stopped at two pieces. Later I had two more pieces, like around 5:00. So not horrible, right? 4 pieces in a day isn't horrible. Except the last piece kept calling to me. Can y'all guess who won? It wasn't me. Then I still had rice and bacon later that night! And somewhere in there I ate a pint of tomatoes...And a bowl of lucky Charms and the last of the milk...The worst part was I didn't have that full feeling I had had the past week. That was how I was more in charge of not eating all the time.

I nodded off while we watched a movie, but I had also worked the two-year-old room during church. My back muscles let me know they got a good workout from carrying toddlers later, too!

I'm hoping the full feeling isn't gone. I actually appreciated it. I'm also hoping my shipment comes in soon! I ordered later on day 5 and am now on day 8. They just shipped last night and I'm not positive the package has actually officially left. It's not that they are taking too long, l just don't want to have a gap.

But today is a new day and it is worth it to keep going even if it isn't as easy as before (I think it was a one time thing, either due to hormones or emotions). So you tell yourself to stop whining!

On the plus side Vee and I painted our "pantry" so I can get my fridge and counter back which will make making good choices in the kitchen easier!

Sixth Day...

So last night I went to Bunco. It was a lot of fun. It was potluck...I took veggies and hummus ;) But I did okay with food. I had a plate of yummies!

What you don't see are two of these! Oh goodness, they were delicious!

And something happened that has never happened...I stopped eating. If there is food out I am usually constantly picking at it. I did have one extra wonton and it was so not worth it. It was awesome to not be constantly wandering by the food table picking stuff up. It was a friend's birthday and I did finish her cupcake. She'd eaten about 2/3 and I ate the rest. It was the perfect amount and while it tasted good I just didn't want any more. I felt free!!!

And then today...we went out around 7:15 to get some stuff to refinish a bookcase. Before breakfast. You can see where this is going...I didn't have my Slim and boost. That's okay, you can have it before any meal. Then we ended up going from Lowe's the Food4Less to WalMart to WalMart to get gas. Except there was a stop to Jack In The Box in there...two tacos and some curly fries later and Vee and I weren't feeling super great. I'm glad the eight-year-old is able to tell that she feels yucky when she eats junk food :) We also had a taco and a few curly fries for snack. Yuck.

I had my Slim and boost around 12:30 and lunch around 1:00 was 2/3 of a thin bagel (Vee's a bagel thief!), 1/2 cup of cottage cheese and a bunch of veggies from last night. Much better!!! I had a homemade coconut milk latte and some watermelon throughout the day. Watermelon sticks are fantastic!

Dinner around 5:30 was a 1/2 cup of rice that I didn't eat much of, a quarter head of roasted cauliflower and some breaded tilapia. I was hungry by 7:45. I'm guessing because I didn't eat my rice. I was also short on water which I know didn't help anything. I had a 1/3 cup of rice and 2 sausage links around 8:45.

Energy...I nodded off today around 2:00 or so. But I got a good bit done and didn't feel draggy today, so that was good.

Thoughts on blogging this. At first it was a good idea, and I still think it is, but it's starting to feel like a chore. And I'm back to measuring food. I don't feel the need to obsess over calories, focusing more on content than content and numbers. I feel fairly confident listening to when I'm full (except today, today feels off-my mouth is saying "feed me" but I'm trying to listen to my stomach, which isn't really saying anything". And I know all this isn't necessarily super interesting to you. Blogging's mainly for me anyway, but still.

Day Five and I'm gonna Party!!!

Breakfast was Slim and boost, Starbucks English muffin with cage-free egg whites and turkey bacon and another trenta iced coffee. While I wasn't AS beat as the last few days I was still tired. I had not quite a half of a piece of pizza at school and I got all the pepperoni. The person I shared it with is a vegetarian, so I got it all!!! (a note on that in a bit) Lunch around 2:30 was "fast-food", meaning whatever fresh&easy had on clearance and I could microwave there. Today it was chicken caprese, so pretty much a chicken breast piece, pasta, spinach, mozzarella and tomatoes. Dinner will be whatever we're having at Bunco! I'm spending time with adults! Someone might even say my name and be talking to me as opposed to work Jessica or school Jessica.

I haven't had enough water yet today. And even when my body felt hungry my stomach never felt empty. Almost like when you drink too much water and you feel all sloshy but without the sloshy itself. So lunch almost felt like too much. So I'm hopeful I'll be able to listen to my body tonight.

I ordered product and after talking to my amazing Sarah I decided to go with just the Slim, though I'll finish my boosts to see if my body starts feeling energized by it. I have taken 5 (I think) of the 12 that I have. If I get a better reaction over the next few days I'll get some more. There's a probiotic that would be nice to try, but not right away.

So we're trying to go cruelty free. Except sometimes I forget, like when I go out to eat. It's a new concept for me and I don't impose it on the girls but am introducing it to them. I don't necessarily mind eating meat. But I don't agree with how animals are treated and slaughtered. So we're slowly transitioning. If I had chickens then it would be "eat all the eggs!" but since we don't have chickens, or a cow or anything else meatish, we're using up what's in the freezer and working on new types of protein.

Day Four

And it's time to commit. I need to buy more supplies in order to do the full 6 weeks and I need to do it soon. And it's a little scary because it's a bit expensive. Especially since it's only been four days.

But in the four days I have definitely been less hungry and I've totally been able to deal with the cravings. Not even "I deserve this because of ______________ or ____________". I'm not sure about the energy part, though, the boost. Between my mum and my youngest being diagnosed with ADD and knowing myself and my habits and the fact that stimulants often put me to sleep I probably should have realized this sooner. I have been pretty tired the last few days and didn't even think about it until talking with one of my colleagues. She has personal experience with the same situation and she's a special education teacher. But Plexus has other add-ons or I may just do the Plexus. It's actually called Slim, so I suppose I ought to call it that.

Yesterday I posted I wasn't quite sure how it works. Here's a little blurb. Nothing overly scientific...

Today foodwise I had a bagel thin with peanut butter and coconut milk, half of each for breakfast and snack around 2:00. Snack at work was a pack of carrots and I had a trenta iced caramel coffee (no milk or half and half, just coffee) before a 1:00 appointment. I had an early dinner around 4:00 of the rest of my spaghetti and garlic bread from last night and a Tropical Chicken Salad with no dressing from fresh&easy after 8:00. The salad was almost too much.

Water has been fine. Two bottles at work and two+ trenta cups this evening. Adults should be drinking half their bodyweight in ounces of water. So I'm 142ish which means I need at least 71 ounces of water. If I exercise I drink at least another 24 ounces. For kiddos we aim for their weight in ounces.

I haven't officially really lost any weight yet, but the low has gotten a smidge lower, it's just not consistently there all the time. I'm also due to restart my cycle soon so we'll blame it on that ;)

Day Three

This whole "30 minutes before eating" thing is kinda buggin'. I went down to have breakfast with my mom and got stuck in traffic. I drank it in the car when I should have been about 30 minutes out but...Then my breakfast got delayed by a phone call. I need to see how close to a half hour before it needs to be. I had breakfast at Ikea. A crappy but delicious breakfast. Fried/baked potato chunks, 2 pieces of sausage, scrambled eggs, french toast sticks with syrup and coffee. I made myself eat and it had to be something that would last because I knew I wouldn't feel like eating for a while due to nerves about a meeting.

Dinner was mediocre spaghetti and a piece of garlic bread at a pizza place-don't ask why I didn't just get pizza...and I get to eat it again tomorrow because there were leftovers :P So it's 9 pm and I'm not hungry at all but feel like eating, it's been a habit to eat when I get home from work and it's not the easiest one to break. I've had an okay amount of water, but probably not enough. I'm still going on that.

How am I feeling? My system isn't trying to clean itself out as much. I got really tired midday but it almost felt like the tired after you exercise the first few times, which has not been the case lately. Yay, Friday! I can't wait to go for a run. I'm just worried about how bad it's going to hurt! And I'm really tired right now but it's been a long day.

Second Day...

I got busy this morning and wasn't really feeling breakfast. I got to sleep around midnight last night and wasn't feeling getting up! I ironed and made my latte with 1/2 cup of coconut milk and realized I had to take my Plexus and boost but then remembered I had to eat. Except it was 730. You take the Plexus 30 minutes before you eat. I still can't remember if I took my boost but I could only find one more pill so I hope so. Breakfast was a banana and half of a potato, ham and egg scramble from fresh&easy that was on clearance.

At snack, the kids' lunch around 11:15, I was actually feeling somewhat hungry. I had another teeny banana and a bag of baby carrots (like a palm sized bag-25 calories or so). School gets out at 12:15 and I was truly hungry but nothing sounded good except more water. At school I had finished my latte and a bottle of water.

My main meal consisted of the lunch special and the halfway decent sushi place down the street. I felt too full but hoped I wouldn't have to eat much later. I've had another 3 glasses of water and a killer headache, which I'm guessing is from the chemicals in the soda rather than the caffeine.

Chicken cutlet, rice, salad, California roll and miso soup. I didn't eat all the rice...

"Dinner" consisted of ramien and an egg. I feel icky. But I was too blah to wash and cut up veggies. But I've had three grapefruit waters! And now you have to read the next paragraph because you're hooked. Muahahahaha!

I took the advice of a few friends and combined soda water or sparkling water or whatever it is with grapefruit juice. Why grapefruit? 'Cause it was on sale. You'll start to see a theme with that. AND I made you a video of me trying it. 'Cause I love y'all that much ;) On that note, it took me a few hours to finish that first glass. Not a fan, I've decided. I think I miss the sweet artificial chemicals, not the fizziness. Now I know...but don't I look adorable in my video ;)

So I'm not really into supplements and gimmicks to lose weight. The first thirty pounds were honestly hard won. I would make bad choices and see the results in how my system felt and how the numbers went up. I would make good choices and see the effects when I felt better (or evened out from the bad choices) and how the numbers would go down. At one point I was checking my fitbit and lose it apps constantly, which is silly considering the lose it only reflects what I put in there. I had them synced at one point but was driving myself crazy. I haven't worn my fitbit zip since Friday. I simply can't find it. That being said I'm giving this a try.

So why Plexus? It had the best sale. And my awesome friend that I would trust with anything in my life trusts Plexus. Not to put too much pressure on her ;) I don't really know how it works. Right now I'm just seeing if it does. I'll give it 6 weeks. 42 days. And see how I feel.

I haven't been able to go run for a week and I am really noticing a difference. The Plexus and boost are supposed to help with endurance and I can't wait to see if it's true!

Trying Something New

So in January I went to a conference with my cousin. My mama paid for the tickets and she left early! While it wasn't "meaty" it was a good reminder of how loved and valued I am. And that I was worthy of taking care of myself. Especially since no one else can. So I went home. I got on the scale. And saw 170.

Halloween 2014. And this was a kind picture!!!

January 25th. Love that hill!

So the next day I went for a walk at the beach. For like 2 miles or something like that. And I did a hill or two. And started watching what I ate.  I had joined a weight loss challenge a few weeks before but had just figured I was throwing the money away. I decided to actually make an effort. Soon I tried Zumba when they had it at church (we have a fitness group with a rotating schedule...I'm not overly fond of yoga, though that is how I knew I was "FAT". I could stretch but the fat was in the way...). And I lost 20 pounds on the challenge and came in tied for 3rd for percentage of body weight lost.

We had a round two where we set a goal. Mine was to get into the 130s, meaning 139.9 would count ;) And I made it right before I went to my sister's and ate everything! So for the last few weeks I've been about 141-142. And I feel fatter now than when I was 170. I didn't realize how heavy I was. There's no one to tell me and all of my clothes were stretchy. I was in 14s, almost 16s. Now I'm in 10s and almost 8s. But I'm not happy with were I'm at.

So 10 pounds is my goal. around 130. But mainly I'd like to be more toned. It's not for anyone. I live by myself and so it's not to please other people. It's more to be healthy and feel comfortable in my own skin. I don't have any before pictures, really. Or measurements. But right now I have a 32 inch waist, 39 inch hips, 22 inch thigh and wear a 36B/C bra,

One pill and one packet per day with some water :)

So enter Plexus. This morning I took a packet and a pill half an hour before I ate. Then I had breakfast. I took a few hours to dink a venti skinny vanilla latte with an extra shot (and now you know my order if you ever decide to bring me Starbucks ;) ). At snack I had two of the cutest, teeniest bananas!!! They weren't even special ones. For lunch it was half a whole wheat turkey wrap from Sprouts and a few handfuls of grape tomatoes and some super strong iced tea. Dinner was a cup of white rice (it cooks faster than brown, unfortunately), zucchini in a teaspoon or so of olive oil and about a cup of dark chicken. I finished my wrap and the pint of tomatoes and two bottles of water. Then I ate veggie straws in the car on the way home from work.

Me in new shoes from my sister!!! June 27, 2015

So how am I feeling? I didn't feel the energy that is supposed to be a benefit but I also worked super late after a late night the night before. But I wasn't really hungry. I had moments where I needed to eat but the cravings were definitely less than usual. My system is cleaning itself out, so it will be nice when all the ick is out. I really wanted a soda but I think part of it was more habit than anything. I'm a diet soda girl, but all of it's bad for you. I wanted more water but was balking at drinking it. Lemon in my water was suggested, as was sparkling water then adding my own lemon to see if it's the carbonization that I like. I usually feel like I need to eat (more of a feeling than a need) when I get home from work. Either I ate more veggie straws than I realized or the Plexus is working on the cravings. I really hope it's the Plexus!